I didn't write this book, It just happened
On surrendering, Partnering with Life and letting it happen
This is the picture of my recently published book called Joe Stories. It's in Farsi and has not been translated to English or any other language yet. I chose **Joe** as the name of the main character because Farsi readers have no background or image when they hear the name, Joe. It’s not an Iranian name.
The book is about conversations between two people about life and how they experience and perceive it. It's like a mentor (Joe) and mentee conversation but at the same time the mentor - Joe - is vulnerable. He's imperfect. He seeks and tries to discover different aspects of life. He becomes intellectual and sensual. He discovers and he confuses. He imagines but he also fails to step. Joe and the other person talk about loneliness, love, stories, hope, happiness, life purpose, and ...
They talk as they observe life. It's about 50 minimal stories. (conversations between Joe and the narrator)
I have a strong feeling about this book. First I started to write these stories on Twitter more than 7 years ago. It was one of the saddest times of my life. At the time I ended an eight years relationship. I was grieving, feeling alone and frustrated.
I never decided to start writing this book. You know, it just happened. The writing was therapy for me. It is now. It always is therapy. At that time writing formed in stories. This is why I have strong feelings about this book. It was never planned but it was born. It comes from suffering. It was like transcending the pain.
In life, we have plans. We set goals and want to achieve them. Behind the achievement mindset, the go-get-it mindset is an assumption that we can control everything. We even objectify the future image. We think the future will be like what we imagine today. We humans think that we can chase life down. We think we can overcome nature. But life is not like that. It happens. It changes. It goes its way.
Life wants to happen. Life is unstoppable. Anytime we try and contain life, or interfere with its fundamental need for expression, we get into trouble. ...
Partnering with life, working with its cohering motions, requires that we take life’s direction seriously. Life moves toward wholeness. This direction cannot be ignored or taken lightly. People do not respond for long to small and self-centered purposes or to self-aggran- dizing work. Too many organizations ask us to engage in hollow work, to be enthusiastic about small-minded visions, to commit ourselves to selfish purposes, to engage our energy in competitive drives. ... When we respond with disgust, when we withdraw our energy from such endeavors, it is a sign of our commitment to life and to each other.
M. Wheatley and M. Kellner-Rogers
Every time I look at this book I ask myself:
Could I decide to write these stories?
My answer is a big NO! It couldn't happen like that.
All the stories remained in an MS Word document on my laptop. It transferred from the old laptop to the new one and the next one. It took seven years for me to publish the book. Again I ask myself: could I publish it sooner? Could I try more publishers?
I'm not sure. Maybe! It's not like that I didn't try. I had conversations with some publishers but couldn't reach an agreement. I wanted to have some drawings for the book. Sketches from artists were not what I was looking for. But 2022 was the right year to publish this book. I have no reason for this. I just sense it.
It's like I had to wait for the time to come. During these times I could edit the stories. I could create images (digital collages) for the book. It's not about the artistic aspect of the images but like the stories, it's my imagination. I could dare to do that. There were times I was crying when creating those pictures. Like this one for the last story of the book where Joe leaves his friend and the book ends.
I think that life is not about pushing things forward. Things happen at the right time. What happens now is the best thing. It needs to be surrendered rather than beginning to challenge situations.
I know, to be surrender can be frightening. It may mean to you like forsake. But surrender is more about commitment, faithfulness, and devotion.
I have worked with many organizations and hundreds of people during these 23 years. I see the controlling pattern. I was like that, and I am like that. This is part of our existence. We constantly want to fix things. We want to fix our organization, our nation, and our relationships. We try to understand phenomena by trying to find what's wrong with them. But we can understand life and the whole by stopping to try to achieve and fix. We need more observation and making sense the life. Nothing is wrong or right. They are as they are.
We have believed that we are the most powerful creature in the world. Then we forget about the chaos and the hidden discipline in it. To surrender is the commitment to sense life and dance with it.
Surrender is the ultimate sign of strength and the foundation for a spiritual life. Surrendering affirms that we are no longer willing to live in pain. It expresses a deep desire to transcend our struggles and transform our negative emotions. It commands a life beyond our egos, beyond that part of ourselves that is continually reminding us that we are separate, different and alone. Surrendering allows us to return to our true nature and move effortlessly through the cosmic dance called life. It's a powerful statement that proclaims the perfect order of the universe.
When you surrender your will, you are saying, "Even though things are not exactly how I'd like them to be, I will face my reality. I will look it directly in the eye and allow it to be here." Surrender and serenity are synonymous; you can't experience one without the other. So if it's serenity you're searching for, it's close by. All you have to do is resign as General Manager of the Universe. Choose to trust that there is a greater plan for you and that if you surrender, it will be unfolded in time.
Surrender is a gift that you can give yourself. It's an act of faith. It's saying that even though I can't see where this river is flowing, I trust it will take me in the right direction.”
― Debbie Ford, Spiritual Divorce: Divorce as a Catalyst for an Extraordinary Life
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